Chaotic Evil and Chaotic Neutral
by RedSkape
Summary: The Joker has disowned Harley yet again, but is it really permanent this time? After leaving her for dead, Harley soon realizes that maybe the Joker wasn't the best lover. Feeling abandoned and utterly useless, she almost completely gives up on life. That is, until a familiar friend helps her overcome her sadness and makes her feel psychotic, in a good way, again.
1. Chapter 1

"But Mistah J, I-" was all Harley could utter before the Joker's gloved hand came down on her face. This was her third screw-up in only a week's time.

"Eight. Teen. Thousand!" he said with a rising tone. "The bomb was worth EIGHTEEN THOUSAND!" he continued, making it a point to over enunciate his words. Harley had accidentally drove Jokers prized vehicle, a truck painted in grim purple and bright green, into a light post. Then into a pot hole, and finally a small store in the backwater part of Gotham. It had a bomb strapped to it that was weeks in the making. Harley herself built it, complete with TWO remote detonators, a changeable countdown timer, and not to mention it was powerful enough to level a quarter of Gotham. It was to be used in Joker's latest 'Get rich and scare millions" gag.

~THWAAK~ "Joker's backhand was worse than the last", Harley thought to herself, cheeks red and raw, not to mention dirty. Most of the red tint in her face, where her elaborate makeup was rubbed off, was from pure shame more than from his violent strokes across her face.

"Mistah J! It was Bats!" she pleaded, hoping, not only to, convince him to calm down but also to hold back tears. She continued, "Okay _maybe_ the pole and pothole were my fault, but Batty blew one of the tires!". She wasn't lying either. Batman had shown up after receiving reports about a 'careless clowny driver that rammed a pole head on and sped off with a suspicious looking metal box in back'. "He _musta_ threw one-a his batarangs or blew the tire somehow!". Harley pleaded that it wasn't her fault (at least not completely). But Joker didn't want excuses, he wanted his eighteen grand bomb back.

To say Quinn was a bit clumsy would be an understatement. Joker knew this, but because of her body and (probably the more accurate reason) psychotic and adrenaline junked mind, he had decided that keeping her around was worth the occasional slip up. But lately it was getting worse, and her 'little accidents' were happening more and more. Normally he'd just ignore and fix her mess, as he himself slightly enjoyed a little bit of chaos now and then. But lately, it was beginning to become too much.

~PAAHK~ his clenched fist made contact with her face rather harshly. His glove cushioned the blow slightly, but not by much, as it still hurt Harley quite a bit. She could feel her eye throb and glow with pain. "That was going to leave a mark" she thought. Even if she was getting beat by what now seemed to be her ex lover, she still always had time to be wise and crack a joke. Even if it was at herself.

"I don't WANT EXCUSES" he shouted in a shrill tone. He raised his hand and struck again with no hesitation. His knuckles on his right hand, now showing through the ripped gloves, were bruised. With his middle knuckle starting to bleed slightly. "But Puddin I can just make a new one and -" she couldn't finish. If it wasn't for Jokers third punch, it would have been her tears preventing her from continuing. "You don't have the RIGHT to plead with me!" ~SHAHK~ This time it was a front handed slap, but to the poor femme clown on the floor, it didn't matter. Her face was numb already and although she wasn't bleeding, at least not yet, it sure hurt like she was bleeding. "MY credibility as a criminally insane psychopath is fleeting!" he scolded. "Ivy just last week destroyed a Wayne Enterprise fuel refinery as an act of ecoterrorism, AND I -" He stopped. "YOU, can't even manage to drive a bomb from an abandoned factory to a hideout!" Joker as of late felt as if his 'friends' in the criminal fold were accomplishing their lifelong goals and actually beating Batman and he was jealous he wasn't a part of it. "I'd have blackmailed Batman, be rich, and STILL have the satisfaction of blowing up that eyesore of a skyscraper!" By this point he was tired and his throat was becoming hoarse with all the yelling and screaming. "WHAT AN INCOMPETENT BIT-" he screamed in his mind.

Joker, looking at his bloodied fist and destroyed glove, turned around to three of his henchmen who had sat there watching the whole thing. One of them was getting a little sick at the sight of this, arguably fair, torture. Joker saw this, grabbed him by the collar of his coat and stabbed his gut with a small knife he had in his pocket. "Anyone else… 'Disagree' with how 'I' choose to punish my pets?" He looked at the two men left standing. "Good". Harley lay on the ground, with a bruised eye and left cheek, whimpering and crying trying to curl into a ball thinking it'd make her disappear. "Do what you will with her, just make sure it…" The Joker chuckled. "Just surprise me! Ha!" He began to walk out then paused for a moment. "Just make sure to take the body and dispose of it. Dead bodies might make our guests think we're uncivilized brutes!" He then continued walking out the door.

~BRHHR~ The van door opened, and a lifeless Quinn was thrown out.

~BOOHK~ Her body lay limp on the side of the road in seemingly the middle of nowhere. It was a long stretch of road covered by dense forest. The two goons drove off without a second thought. Harley slipped in and out of consciousness. She was alive, but at this point, she was hoping and begging for death. Her happy disposition was replaced with self loathing and depression. Never had she felt like this. She felt alone, as her only partner and, at least as far as she was concerned, lover was gone forever. She felt cold. She looked down her body as she lay on the dirt. Her clothes were but messily thrown back on. She was just happy that the two grunts had the 'decency', she hated herself for using that word, to put her clown themed suit back on. She didn't even need to look to tell that she had a bruised rib and hickeys all up her body. She looked down to confirm her suspicions, and sure enough, there they were. They trailed down her neck to her chest and thighs. Not only had a few of her ribs bruised, but her left arm and left torso were as well. She felt broken. She felt violated. And now that she lacked someone to cling to in her life, her mental disorder forced her to also feel disconsolation and dejection. She cried. She lay half naked on the dirt, on the side of a road in the middle of nowhere, and just cried.

~caklpacKRUNCH~ Quinn could hear noises in the dark, the moon had just rose, and the scared Quinn was all alone. Face smeared with makeup and dried blood with some mud rubbed in. She partly hoped that the cold would kill her off. At least then she wouldn't feel so miserable. She relived the last few moments she had with… "Puddin". She shivered a little at the word. She couldn't believe what he had done. This wasn't the first time he beat her, but it had also never ended in him sending his goons to 'do whatever' and dump her somewhere out of sight. She cried some more. She didn't know what to do. She was confused and above all else mortified and ashamed.

Later into the night, she could almost hear his voice yelling and scolding her. She could swear she felt his fist come down on her again, but it was just her imagination. She was reliving the whole experience, when suddenly she remembered in his rantings him mentioning Ivy. "IVY! OF COURSE!" She thought. Ivy had been one of her closest friends. She chuckled. Who was she kidding, she had no 'close' or 'best friends'. Her life until now was always 'Joker this', 'Puddin that', and she had never really felt like she needed anyone else. Besides, she would be too ashamed to visit her anyways. Ivy had told her straight that Joker was bad news and that the only reason he kept her around was because she amused him. Countless times Ivy had lectured her about how something just like this would end up happening. Harley couldn't go to her. She couldn't bear to look Ivy in the face. Her hopeful and joyous thought soon returned to shame and self pity.

It was almost midnight, and the poor heartbroken Quinn girl lay freezing on the cold dirt. She was in and out of sleep as she couldn't ignore the freezing weather and rolling wind. She knew it. This was how she died. Not in some crazy explosion or cool high speed adrenaline pumped cop chase or shootout. Nope. Freezing to death in the middle of nowhere. She started to slip away again. Managing to get some shut eye.

~KRUNCH~ "AAIHHH!" She screeched. A bug had crawled onto her foot and bit her. That was it. She couldn't stay on the dirt. She knew that if she did, more creepy crawlies would crawl on her creepily. And she hated creepy crawlies. She staggered and sat up. The bruises somehow managed to hurt worse than when she first got them. She stood up aching and complaining to herself the whole time. She then had to decide to go left or right. One way had to lead her in the right direction, she pondered hopefully. She looked down and saw a flower, picked it, and hugged it. "Ivy, I know you probably can't hear this, but I reeeaaally need help right now. Which way? Right or left?" She didn't know what she expected. Maybe a little voice saying 'GO LEFT HARLEY'. But as she held the flower, a small gust of wind came, and a pedal fell off and blew in the direction of the left path (even though it was one long road, she went left from where she was standing). "Alrighty Ivy, I hopya right." She stated, almost for a second believing that Ivy was talking to her through the flower. She dropped it and started her long walk.

To her disbelief, the way she went was the right way. In about two hours she could see Gotham's skyscrapers. And an hour later entered the city. But what now? It's not like she could just call up her recluse of a friend. She also didn't remember where her hideout was. She felt overwhelmed again. _What Now?_ She figured best place to start was the, ironically and obviously, abandoned botanical garden towards the slums of Gotham. Part of her hoped that Ivy wasn't that predictable, but the other half screamed 'please. Please be there'. She started her venture to the gardens. It was almost 4:30 in the morning by now. She was exhausted. But right now, walking was the only thing she could do, as it distracted her from Puddin and kept her from breaking down.

~BOHCBOHCBOHC~ Quinn's knocks pattered the door of the building hopefully. 'Please' she thought. 'Please open up. If there was eva a time I needed ya Red, it was now'. Nothing happened. Her hopeful attitude soon shifted into disappointment and sorrow. She slowly began backing away from the door. One step at a time, slowly by slowly. 'Please, something, anything! Stop me from leavin'. Please'. There wasn't any hope behind her whispers however. The poor clown was just trying to fool herself.


	2. Chapter 2

"EEEEE!" she squealed. A vine had wrapped around her ankle, and when she looked back up the door was open. It was Ivy. 'Well duh of course it was' she thought. Her eyes welled with tears.

"Harley? What are you doing here?" Ivy really didn't need to ask. She knew. It was the look Harley had in her eyes. It was how she was dressed. It was her muddied face and bruised arm. She wasn't an idiot, infact quite the opposite.

"RED!" the over joyous Quinn jumped and ran into Ivy's arms. Ivy could hear her sniffle and knew that she would have to deal with this mess. 'Greeaat…' she thought. Once every few months Harley would stop by with the same problem. By now Ivy was simply fed up with it and didn't want to argue with Harley about "Puddin" and how he treats her.

"Ya know, normally when you hug people, ya wrap your arms around em too ya know" Harley half joked, half implied. Ivy rolled her eyes, but embraced a broken Quinn. Above all else, through thick and thin, no matter how stubborn and stupid the blond could be sometimes, Ivy always caved in with her. She could never be mad at her for long and always came around to forgiving Harley for whatever idiotic mistake she made. "Red", she mumbled while burying her face in Ivy's shoulder. "I reeaaally screwed up this time". Ivy had a hint at what this meant, but she was still contemplating it.

~KUUDCHANG~ The metal door gently closed. Harley instantly ran and dove into what seemed to be a couch. It was covered in leaves and flowers but it was better than the muddy ground on the side of a road that's for sure. "YYOWCH" the clown screamed, "something poked me!". "Did you not see the thorny roses and vines on the cushions before jumping on?" Ivy partly scolded, partly informed. Quinn pouted, stood up, and rebuked "Well _I'm_ not the one who put thornies on a couch!". Before Ivy completely started a shouting match with the broken Harley, she took a deep breath, and took a second to recollect herself.

"Did you need something?" she gritted her teeth. She still wondered why there was a half beaten clown in her house. "Mistah J kicked me out again…" Harley could instantly feel Ivy's glare and eye rolling. "And this time I think he's permanently done with me…" she trailed off. She was expecting an argument right now. She was mentally preparing for a shout out and was ready to defend herself against a rash and stubborn plant hybrid. She had almost opened her mouth to get her two cents in before Red had a chance to start lecturing. But to her surprise, Ivy didn't scold her or even say a single word. She simply walked up to Harley, and hugged her.

"Uhh.. Red? You okay?" Quinn questioned in skepticism. This had never happened before. There wasn't any yelling or scolding. Just a consoling Ivy and a broken Harley. "I told you this would happen. Now look at you" the redhead softly chided. She could feel the blond's tears on her shoulder and her slight shaking and sniffling. "Come on, theres a shower upstairs" Ivy informed, slightly pulling away and trying to look at Quinn's face. "I'm sure I have a change of clean clothes somewhere around here too". Harley looked at Ivy in disbelief. 'What?' she thought. Since when had Red ever been that nice to her? No argument, no lecture, and a bath?

~EEEIK EEEIK CCHH~ The shower nozzle turned on. "AAHH HOT WATER!" Harley shouted joyously. At this point she had no remembrance of her last bath. She didn't care, the hot water felt good. She washed her makeup off and took out her pigtails. She felt like every inch of her was filthy and so thirty minutes later, she was still in there, scrubbing and washing away.

"Hey, _Harleen,_ don't wash yourself down the drain in there" Ivy teased behind the door. "Sticks and stones Red!" the blond shouted back. In one loud squeak, she turned off the shower and began drying herself. She looked in the landscape styled long mirror on the wall. Were the bruises and marks really that bad? Yes. Yes they were. There were even handprint bruises along her torso and arms. She had a black eye and little scrapes dotting her face. Not to mention a completely bruised left cheek. At Least half, if not more, of her body was covered in black and blue splotches and swells.

~KREEEEK~ she opened the bathroom door. On the ground there was a white t-shirt and a pair of black basketball shorts. "Nothin fancy but it'll do" she whispered to herself. She looked back at her clown themed get-up. It was destroyed. Rips and tears everywhere. Not only from the accident, but also from the two grunts that beat her and did _various_ other things. She shivered thinking about it. The, _now clean_ , Quinn put on the shirt and shorts and didnt bother to tie her hair back up into pigtails.

"Red!" she called. She went stumbling around looking for a redheaded plant hybrid. Ivy was cleaning up the living room for Harley, and made her a bowl of soup with some of her magically (and scientifically) enhanced roots and herbs to help the femme clown heal up and rest.

"What smells so good?" Harley queried excitedly. "I made you something to eat and cleaned the living room of my 'thornies' and roses" Ivy said matter of factly. Harley could barely verbalise a "THANKS RED!" before diving straight towards the bowl and curling up on the couch. Ivy wouldn't have admitted it, but she was happy that Harley was there with her. She wasn't exactly happy about the circumstances, but after a while, talking to plants can get a bit boring. And Harley was the polar opposite of boring. So Ivy admired her for that.

Ivy sat down on the couch next to her much welcomed guest. She looked over and could see markings and bruises up Quinn's legs and arms, as well as red swells on her neck. Normally when Harley stayed at Ivy's, it was after a falling out with Joker. So Ivy really wasn't surprised this time. Normally there'd be some long motherly lecture about how he was bad for her and how she should take better care of herself. But this time, something was different. Ivy didn't want to yell at the poor broken Quinn girl. She looked over at Harley again. To say she was mad wouldn't do her emotions justice. But instead of starting an argument, she simply started with

"You want to talk about it?". Wanna talk about it? Of course Harley wanted to talk about it. She just didn't have the energy to say anything. Putting the now empty soup bowl on the coffee table, Harley looked at Ivy, and simply replied "Maybe tomorrow okay Red?". Ivy could take a hint. Harley was obviously very uncomfortable about everything and probably still needed time to process everything that happened. "Well…" she started. "Your welcome to stay as long as you need to". "Of course I am ya big dope" Harley jokingly taunted Ivy. She then threw her a huge smile and laid back on the couch. Ivy went to go and get some blankets and a spare pillow for the now extremely sleepy Quinn.

When she got back to the living room, her guest was already asleep. So she opened the blanket and laid it carefully atop the peacefully resting girl. But when Ivy looked down, something was different. She felt it. Something about how she looked at Harley had changed. But what was it? What exactly was she feeling? She didn't know. Part of her wanted to suppress it, but the other part wanted to let whatever she felt grow into something bigger.

Ivy looked at Quinn's youthful face and blond hair. It wasn't in her pigtails and was kind of strewn around on her face and the couch. "If it wasn't for her bruises" the plant hybrid thought to herself, "She would look absolutely-" she stopped thinking immediately. _What was she doing_? Why did she have this thought. She looked back at the Quinn girl. She wouldn't have admitted it but she studied Harley's chin and neck and chest, and stopped where the blanket had started (on her higher abdomen). _What was she doing_? And suddenly, without her even thinking about it, she bent over, brushed the hair off of Harley's right cheek, and kissed it. She stood still for a second. Shocked at what just happened. She didn't know why she did it, but it felt like something was telling her to. She slowly walked to her bed, hoping that maybe this was all a dream. She was just thankful that Quinn was asleep.

Harley woke up with a loud yawn. She scanned her surroundings, almost lost for minute, before remembering where she was. There were thick curtains over all the windows so she couldn't tell what time of day it was. She clumsily stood up, almost losing her balance twice, and walked towards the closest window. She pulled back the curtain, and bright light flushed the room. She cringed and squinted her eyes. "AAHH" she squealed. Her fresh woken eyes weren't prepared or adjusted to the sunlight and it felt like "hot coins were placed on her eyeballs" she thought.

"You okay in there?" she could hear Ivy yell from outside the window. She was watering her garden outside and fertilizing a new section of the yard to grow a bigger natural fruit and vegetable farm. "THE SUN!" Harley cried. She threw the curtain back, dove for the couch and covered her eyes.

Ivy walked in after finishing up her garden and saw that Harley was missing from the living room. She walked into the kitchen and, sure enough, there the blond was. Digging in cupboards for cereal and a big bowl. "What are you doing?" The redhead watched in amazement at how intensely Harley was 'preparing' her breakfast. Breakfast was also a loose term as it was somewhere around 1 in the afternoon. Harley ripped open the box and poured half of it into a bowl. "Are you really going to eat that much?" Ivy questioned in bafflement. But Harley's meal didn't end there. She opened the refrigerator and pulled out ice cream and whipped cream. "Oh No" the redhead mumbled to herself.

It always baffled Ivy how Harley could eat so much junk food and still be thin and keep a figure. 'Insanity burns calories' was always Harleys montra. After watching Harley's sugary splurge, Ivy made herself a fruit salad and sat in the living room. She decided to take a break after working so hard all morning. She turned on the tv and switched to the news channel. She loved it when reporters would talk about her latest crime or destruction spree. "The hunt for Ivy is still on. Investigators are still unsure how famed eco terrorist and Arkham escapee Pamela Isley, AKA Poison Ivy, managed to destroy a local Wayne Ent-" the news reporter informed. Just three days ago Ivy had managed to sneak past Wayne Enterprises advanced security systems and destroy multiple oil rigs and refineries as well as a chemical plant. She loved causing havoc in Gotham, however not for the sake of chaos. Atleast not entirely. She felt like it was her personal mission to destroy corporate America and stop man from ruining the world and destroying nature. And lately it seemed as if she was succeeding.

"So that's why Bats has been so jumpy and vigilant lately" Harley affirmed, while walking out of the kitchen to the living room. "Between you and the rest of Gotham's criminally insane, no wonder he's starting to crack down and pay more attention to odd going ons". And of course, Harley was right. Lately, Bruce Wayne had been losing money in the millions from Arkham escapees wreaking havoc on his branches of Wayne Enterprises. So to stop crime and fix the sinking economy, of course Batty would have to be more vigilant and be more proactive about Gotham's safety.

"Yeah. I sure gave that stuck up billionaire a run for his money" Ivy replied. Harley almost completely blanked from the conversation and looked at Ivy's fruit salad. "Just fruits?" She thought. She ripped the bowl from Ivy's hand and ran into the kitchen.

"Hey! I was -" Ivy verbalised before being cut off by Harley, "eating a very boring bowl of sadness" the blond mocked. She shot for the fridge and whipped out yogurt and cool whip. "Ya know, for a plant hybrid who hates corporate America and junk food, it's surprising to find so much of it in your house!" Harley teased. Of course, this wasn't a complaint, as she absolutely loved sweet sugary goodness in a can. "Fine, I'll just stop buying it, how does that sound?" the redhead quickly sassed back. "Awww, don't be like that Red, I wasn't complaining" Quinn said with a big smile hoping to pull a laugh out of her now irritated host.

After about one minute Harley was done with her master piece. A fruit yogurt salad with half a can of whipped cream on top. She threw Ivy's fork into the sink and grabbed two spoons, then darted back for the couch. "Harley I didn't want that in my-" Ivy complained. "SSHHHH! You can thank me later" Harley shot back surely. They sat back on the couch sharing a bowl that was now overflowing with puffy sugar.

"And in other news, Jokers latest plot foiled by, you guessed it, Batman. A purple and green pickup truck was recovered today with a locked black box in the trunk. Batman has taken custody of the crate to disarm what is assumed to be a nuclear device with a force equivalent to 15 kilotons of tnt, or roughly the explosive equivalent of the bombs dropped on Hiroshima by America in WWII".

Harley looked at the screen. "I guess it was only a matter-a time before it was on the news" She looked downtrodden again. She started to remember the car accident and Jokers hostility towards her. For a few short moments she started to zone out. After she came to, she saw Ivy shaking her arm and staring at her. "Hey, you okay?" she asked. "Yeah, I'm fine. I just..." Harley slowly trailed off. She immediately started to close up and pull her arms closer. She could feel her shoulders starting to slouch. Ivy could see that she wanted to be alone right now. "Well Harls, if you need me, I'll be outside in the garden, okay?". Harley snapped out of the daze she was in to answer back. "Okay".

A few hours later, roughly around 7 o'clock, Ivy came back inside. She had just finished planting the last of her seeds and reinforced the bush-fence barrier around the property. She liked her privacy and thought it would help her stay hidden. Harley had spent her whole day channel surfing, watching a mixture of children's cartoons and action flicks. It helped to keep her mind off Joker and was her special way of coping with her emotions.

Ivy walked past the couch and rubbed Harley's hair before going upstairs to the bathroom and taking a shower. Unlike Harley who goofed a lot and played with the soap whenever taking a bath, Ivy was a more straight to the point kind of person. After about ten minutes she was done and drying herself already. Ivy normally didn't shower that often, as she naturally always smelled like fresh honey or sweet fruits. And the dirt didn't bother her too much as she loved to work in her garden and her new green house. But since Harley was here, she felt like presenting herself. Especially now since she had become particularly self conscious around Harley.

She stopped by her room after leaving the bathroom to care for her indoor plants. She trimmed her three bonsai trees, watered her small fertilizers that lined the wall, and made sure to tend to her more carnivorous and dangerous vegetation. It took about an hour to take care of everything. She double checked to make sure she had done all of her chores, then left the room.

As she walked down stairs, Harley was just finishing up the dishes and crawling back into her makeshift couch-bed. Ivy lifted Harley's feet and sat at the left side of the couch. She started massaging the blond's feet, and noticed how soft they were. "NO. STOP THINKING!" Ivy screamed in her head. Her 'over familiar' thoughts were coming back. By this point she couldn't help but follow her legs all the way up to her face. "So do you want to talk about what happened now?" Ivy asked, hoping to distract her mind from Harley's body. "There's not much to really say Red…" Quinn started. "I drove Mistah J's expensive bomb right into Batman's hands, he got rightfully angry, and left me for dead in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night probably hoping that if I wasn't dead already from what him and his goons had done to me, that the wilderness would finish the job". Ivy could hear her voice begin to shake towards the end of her short monologue.

Harley almost began to cry again, thinking about the horrors she experienced in the van, but then she heard Ivy calmly and reassuringly say "Harls, I know you must feel terrible right now, and you have every right to be angry and mad" she looked to see Harley's reaction. "But it'll get better. I'll make sure it gets better"

"-Joker caught breaking into a military base on the outskirt of Gotham attempting to steal a high yield explosive that was being shipped across country. Batman arrived on scene before hand after interrogating one of Joker's recently arrested gang members. Luckily, no one was harmed and Joker was apprehended and taken to Arkham Asylum immediately after capture, with a personal escort from Batman. Later tonight-" Almost as if on queue, the news reporter spoke some oddly coincidental and convenient information.

"Hey, you were right Red" Harley said jokingly. She chuckled a bit and stretched back on the couch. Boy was Ivy happy that the news reporter had something decent to say, as she was running out of pep talk for Harley. She was fine and relaxed for a minute or so before she yawned, and looked right to see the beautiful blond lying next to her watching her childish cartoons. Part of her felt happy that Harley would occasionally laugh or smirk at the tv whenever some stupidly childish cringey line was said. Or just a genuinely funny joke. Either or, she was happy that Harley was happy.

Ivy loved Quinn's smile. And before she knew it, she realized that she was unconsciously scanning Harley again. "Why am I having these thoughts?" she wondered. "Why do I feel this way about her? Why her? Of anybody in the world…" she stopped. "What exactly is what i feel?" She was angry that the blond confused her so much about her own thoughts and emotions. Was it pity? Was it platonic? Was it genuine love? Was it just her being lonely and needing someone by her side? She felt vulnerable and weak and didn't know what to do or think or, more importantly, how to tell Harley what exactly she felt. The more she thought about it the angrier she got.

She started to get up off the couch and walk to her room as she thought maybe if she just thought about it in silence alone she could figure it out. But as she took her first step, she heard Harley ask "I don't get a sweet dreams kiss tonight?". "WHAT!" Ivy thought. "Was she awake when I kissed her? Is she teasing me?" Ivy instantly froze with shock and panic. What would she do? What could she do? She felt as if time had slowed, almost as if it completely froze. "I wouldn't mind a goodnight kiss". Was Harley mocking her? Was she serious? Ivy just stood still, part of her hoping that if she didn't move, she could pretend that this wasn't happening right now. Before she knew it, Harley had grabbed her hand and pulled her back towards the couch. She turned and landed in the middle of the couch. She looked at Harley and before she could process what was going on, she could feel the blond's lips press against her own. Quinn slowly pulled away and looked Ivy in the eyes. Did she share Ivy's feelings of confusion and attachment? What was going on? Ivy didn't care. She shifted forward to touch Harley's lips again.


	3. Chapter 3

Ivy leaned in to Harley, eventually hovering inches over her. "You can pay me back for the fruit yogurt now" Harley smiled at the redhead. "What do I do?" Ivy worried in her mind. She was still panicking and felt like she was losing control of her body. She kissed Harley again, this time more intensely and not so delicate. Harley started running her hands up Ivy's waist, to her abdomen then chest. "Oh no, it's happening" Ivy was freaking out. "She's pulling me closer, NO NO NO" Ivy didn't know how this would work. With a guy and a girl it's pretty straight forward. This is something she never thought in an eternity she would have to figure out. "Calm down Red, just relax" Harley reassured her anxious and worried partner. She could feel Ivy becoming more and more tense. She pulled the nervous wreck of a plant hybrid down on top her. Their bodies were touching. Ivy wasn't sure if it was a good thing or a bad thing that she only had her leafy two piece on. Leafy two piece? "Oh no" she thought. What if her skin was too coarse or still had some dirt on it? What if she wasn't good at it and any chance she had with Quinn was gone? Was Ivy overthinking this? Absolutely. Was it gonna be nearly as bad as she thought it'd be? Nope. But Ivy's paranoia was getting the better of her.

"Ah" Ivy let out. Harley started kissing her jawline and neck, and began running her hands down Ivy's back. Ivy started running her hands up Harley's loose shirt. She had lost control. She couldn't help herself and before she knew it, her hands reached Harleys chest. Harley leaned slightly up and kissed Ivy. Her tongue seeking entry into Ivy's mouth. On the inside, Ivy was freaking out. But on the outside, she began to feel calmer and less tense. She allowed the clown to enter. Her leafy two piece began to disappear. The density appeared thinner and thinner and in almost no time it was completely gone.

Ivy pulled Harleys shirt off, and commanded some of her less thorny vines to tug down her basketball shorts. "This was it" Ivy thought. She was about to figure out exactly how this was going to work.

Ivy started kissing Harleys neck, slowly moving down to her chest and stomach. How intense was she supposed to be? How kinky or passionate was this supposed to be? She hesitated for a second. She then continued down Harley's stomach to the end of her lower abdomen. "Here I go" she thought. Was she doing it right? "Absolutely" Harley would have answered. Did Ivy think she was doing it right? Absolutely not. But she took Harley's slight leg twitching and arm fidgeting as a good sign. She was right.

Ivy slowly made her way back up to Harleys chest then lips. Harley pushed up until they were both upright on the couch. Then slowly began to push Ivy onto her back and began her adventure down Ivy's body. Lips, jaw, neck, chest, abdomen, then she finally landed at her goal. Ivy almost screamed. "What was going on? How did this happen? How should I feel about this? I didn't know a tongue could- AHH! Am I doing it right? Don't. Stop" Ivy was screaming in her mind and before she knew it, "AAHHH" she let out. . There it was. Harley crawled her way back up to Ivy's face and kissed her one last time. "Goodnight Red" Harley smiled. They quickly curled up in the blanket, and in a matter of moments, Quinn fell asleep. Ivy couldn't stop thinking about what had just happened. It was quick, or at least it felt quick. What did this mean for them? What was their relationship going to be in the morning? Was that 'Yeah we're dating now' sex, or just 'I wanted quick action' sex. Ivy's mind wouldn't let her stop freaking out. But then she glanced at the now asleep girl that was lying naked on her. She squeezed her partner lightly then soon after fell asleep.

Ivy awoke to Harley staring at her. She gave a disgruntled morning groan and sharply questioned "What are you doing". Harley widened her small smirk to a full smile and replied "I was just lookin', no harm done". Harley gave out a loud, over exaggerated yawn and slowly pushed herself up from the poor plant hybrid who was rudely awoken from a rather comfortable nights sleep.

"SoooOoo" Quinn started while putting on her tshirt from the night before. "Are we… Like a thing now?" She asked pulling up her shorts. "Or do ya want me to forget about what happened last night and pretend it nevah happened?" "Why would I want that?" Ivy snappily answered back. She enjoyed herself last night. Was this Harley's way of letting her down gently? Ivy's mind was, of course, just overreacting and over thinking. "Well, Pud… Mistah J likes when I pretend nothing happened and gets really mad when I bring it up" Harley down heartedly informed. Joker hated when Harley thought anything special of a little action. It was even the cause of one of Harley's first expulsions from his posse. "Well, I'm not Joker" Ivy began. She felt remorse for the clown. "I kind of liked what happened last night and would rather not forget such a huge milestone in our relationship -" she stopped… Was what they had even a romantic relationship? She saw Harley's eyes start to widen. The next two minutes were either going to be really good or extremely bad.

"You mean, I could be like… be your girlfriend and go on dates and cuddle and get you mad and not be worried about getting eaten by a huge viney man eaty plant" they blond began. Then she let out a huge gasp "OooO and go on adventures and solve mysteries and be partners in crime and -" Harley was absolutely excited about what she assumed Ivy was implying.

"Calm down Harls" Ivy said, but it was mostly a reassurance for herself. She was absolutely ecstatic about what just happened. Ivy let a small smile show but almost immediately returned to a sterner more serious face.

"I could be like Indiana Jones and you could be my-" Harley was still going on about her girl-venture with Ivy. "Harley!" Ivy yelled, trying to catch the blond's attention. Quinn immediately stopped and looked at her shouting house mate. Ivy then placed her hands on Harley's shoulders and looked her partner in the face. "Go take a bath and wash up, and I'll make breakfast okay? I feel like you need time to process this". That was a lie. Ivy was the one who needed time alone to process what was happening. "Okay Red, but when I come back I better have ice cream covered pancakes with a bowl of Cookie Crisp" Harley warned Ivy. She then ran upstairs and rushed her shower so she could hurry and eat a very sugary breakfast.

"Ice cream on pancakes…. Who gets ice cream with pancakes -" Ivy started to complain to herself. "She better fix her diet soon or she's going to have a problem" she said pulling the tub of cookie cream ice cream out of the freezer. "Now that I think of it, I do have a calorie reducing herb in my garden… I don't think Harley would mind me putting a few thinning ingredients into her sugar-splosion of a meal" Ivy thought out loud. She quickly ran to her garden, picked a few herbs then ran back inside to the kitchen. She diced then real small to trick the clown into thinking they were sprinkles. After preparing a meal worth 3 days of calories, she didn't feel too hungry and as such, just munched on homemade dried fruit and a mango.

By the time Harley had come downstairs her breakfast was on the coffee table waiting. "YAY!" She yelled and nearly shed a tear of joy. She immediately started eating and before long, was finished with the bowl. "Feed me like this and I'll never leave!" She exclaimed at the hybrid who was sitting next to her watching a bowl of near pure sugar enter a paper thin blond. Which brought up an interesting question. "How do you stay so thin with an appetite and sweet tooth like the one you own?" Ivy partly scolded and partly questioned. "Well, Mistah J normally keeps me away from the kitchen and doesn't let me eat much. He thinks I'll ruin my image and says if that happens he'd needa get ridda me for good. But since I don't intend on going back, Im going to spoil myself". She then looked up from her bowl and looked at Ivy. "But don't worry, I'll try and keep myself relatively healthy. Can't go adventuring if I don't fit in a getaway car!" She laughed. She was serious though. In what she thought of as a life of shame and self pity, she felt her figure was one of the only things she could be proud about.

Ivy once again only felt worse at what Harley had said. She knew that Joker didn't treat Harley well, but to hear exactly how he'd mistreat the, now, love of her life, made her not only angry, but also sorry for her love. It always had bothered her whenever Harley would talk about Joker and what he'd do.

So Ivy took Harley's hand and looked the blond in the eye. "We can go adventuring as much as you want. You don't ever need to go back to Joker, and we can live happily ever-" "AFTER" the blond cut her off. Ivy was happy that Harley shared in her enthusiasm. "YAY RED! We can rob banks and dodge cops and, best of all, poke and tease at Batsy!" Harley was so excited and she nearly fell off the couch jumping about in excitement.

Harley then looked at Ivy and grabbed her forcefully. She then quickly leaned in and kissed the unsuspecting woman. "Now I begin the best and greatest adventure of all!" She shouted enthusiastically. "What's that?" Ivy asked, straightening up on the couch. Harley simply looked over at Ivy and stared into her eyes. A big smile grew on her face and replied "My life with you!" She said in a rising tone.

 **~~~1 month later~~~**

"Hey Harls" Ivy called from the living room. "Yea, hun" Harley answered back from the hallway atop the stairs. She walked out and started her way down stairs. "I found where that zombie root was being held. Feel like breaking into a secured building and stealing a jeweled plant from the Botanical Society?" Ivy more commanded then queried. "Sure Red! Sounds fun!" Harley answered. Immediately they started plotting the heist. They were acquiring a plant powerful enough to create mind control poisons. Powerful enough to take over Gotham. And make even the great Batman a mere puppet. The heist was planned perfectly. Harley had just mis informed Ivy about one detail. One crucial and important detail that would make or break the plan. What day the gala would be held in the plants honour.

 **End**

This was my first Harley and Ivy fic, and I drew a lot of inspiration from the Harley and Ivy graphic novel by Paul Dini. Especially towards the end. And though I didn't intend for it to be a prequel to the novel, I decided to end it where the book starts, the attempted theft of the zombie plant. I hope you all enjoyed this rather short story nonetheless. I'm also planning on writing a sequel ish sorta thing to this one, so if that's something you'd be into, then keep an eye open for it! That's all, hope all of your beauties enjoyed!


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